A Hound and his Name

Certainly it's ideal, when naming someone, to get a glimpse of her personality first, so you can tell if you're dealing with a Claire or a Chloe. Sometimes though, that is simply impossible, and one must employ other means of arriving at an appropriate name.

Meet Lindsay and Matt. Lindsay is my sister, and Matt is her husband. They live in the beautifully dreary Puget Sound region (Puget (pew-jet) being, incidentally, rather ugly sounding) of western Washington, and they are sensible people: they keep a budget and like breakfast for dinner. They're also expecting their first baby in June. However, at the moment we're not concerned with the enticing question of what they'll name their little offspring; first, there is another member of the family we must consider.

Meet Jetson. Jetson is not at all sensible. He chews up potholders and sings "Roooo! Roooo!" quite noisily. He is an eighty pound coon hound from rural Idaho ("rural Idaho" is kind of redundant) whom Lindsay fell in love with via the animal shelter website. Regretfully Jetson has issues with his anal glands, so much so that his veterinarian is calling in a specialist to operate on them (which of course leads me to wonder how one's specialty becomes dog anal glands). The shelter staff had named him "Butch," which Linds and Matt knew was far too unsophisticated for such a (they were sure) deep and complex spirit. Thus began the quest for the perfect name for their noble beast. How did they land on Jetson (do you get the pun- land and jet)? Let's consider the process.

To begin with, Lindsay and Matt did not choose a name before the animal. This is significant, as it is not unusual (indeed, I often do this) to have a name in mind first. When Lindsay found herself back home in Puyallup with her seemingly amiable yet still enigmatic new pooch, she had do come up with something other than "Butch" that was not altogether different sounding (to ease the transition for him). At one point she and Matt tossed around the name "Jet." Jet soon evolved to "Jetson," and over the next few days they kept coming back to it. Lindsay explained that "Jetson is a sleek name, and he is a very sleek dog." The fact that his coat is jet black did not escape them either.

Perhaps you recognize the name as that of a famous futuristic cartoon family, but Lindsay assures that it's coincidental. They chose the name because it is unique (though they have heard of a couple other canine "Jetsons") and it tends naturally to the pleasant nicknames of "Jet" and "Jetty" (a must in my family of nicknamers). Thus Jetson was named.

Weeks after the fact, as his personality (or would it be poochanality) was made known, my sister and brother-in-law were convinced they had chosen well: "Jetson is a strong name, not for pansies." Lindsay remarked. Though (at times disastrously) boisterous and playful, Jetson is first and foremost devoted to his people. He is "droopy and sleepy" (Lindsay calls him "Honey Bunches" at such moments), but is also "prancy and jolly." Certainly not just any name would suit the big sock-stealing fellow; Linday and Matt sized him up, and it fits him well.

Ageless Names

Like the best cheeses, a good name ages well, and will suit its bearer in every stage of his or her life. It's equally strange (for me at least) to picture a baby Elmer toddling around as it is to envision a dignified, elderly Skyler (though it is a lovely name). Of course, in eighty years the earth could be teeming with senile Skylers, and there could be three Elmers in every kindergarten class, but at this moment those names would cause me to pause and consider before imposing them on my helpless infant.

So how do you know that a name will age well? To start with, names that tend not to age well are generally either ridiculous to begin with (think "Moxie" or "Cloud") or names that come seemingly out of nowhere (meaning they have little history and often are inspired by popular culture), gain various degrees of popularity, and then fade quickly away (like "Miley"). On the other hand, a name that has been around for at least a couple decades (sorry, Nevaeh) is more likely to grow with a child, even if it at no point is a “popular” name, especially if a handful of people in each generation use it (for example, “Tucker”).

Another tip: choosing a name with age-appropriate nicknames (people tend to love or hate nicknames- “I named her that so no one could give her a nickname!” or “There are a dozen nicknames he can choose from!” I am a nickname lover). A couple examples: the name “James” can easily become Jamie, Jimmy, or Jim, and “Christina” turns into Chrissy, Chris, Tina, Christine, etc. “Elizabeth” is another classic example, with nicknames for every personality and stage in life. In naming our daughter, Aurora, Blake and I considered that while Aurora is very feminine, her nickname, Rory, is more cute and playful. As her little personality comes out more and more, we’ll see what we end up calling her most.  

                The last thought for today is this: many names from the Bible are always in style, and there are lots of options other than “Mary” (though Mary, Maria, and Marie are all lovely names). For instance, “Samuel” is a name that will never been obscure, though it probably will rarely be top ten. It has nice nickname options and it’s easy to imagine a Samuel as President of the United States or as a mechanic. Even more unusual Bible names like “Eden,” “Joelle,” and “Asher” will be readily recognized throughout the child’s life (just make sure you know the story of whichever name you choose so your sweet baby girl doesn’t end up with the beautiful but unfortunate name “Jezebel”).

                To sum it all up, if you’d like a name that will suit your little one in every stage of his life, run it through these different scenarios: Will little  ___________ ‘s substitute teachers butcher his name for the first eighteen years of his life? Can you imagine a minister saying his name at the altar when he is about to be married ("Do you, Percy, take this woman…")? Is the name as suitable for the president of a country or corporation as it is an auto salesman or a volcanologist? Can you imagine your grandparents with that name?

                What are two of my all time favorite ageless names? Sarah and David. You simply can’t go wrong with Sarah and David.

On the Importance of Vowels

A couple of years ago my inlaws received a lovely birth announcement from the elated parents of a new baby girl. However, the baby's name was misspelled. Only not really.

Peytn. That's how they spell their daughter's name. PEYTN. P-E-Y-T-N. Maybe you're thinking what we were thinking. Where's the last vowel??? Granted, it's spelled just like we Americans pronounce it, but I can't help but feel bad for a girl who is going to spend her whole life enduring the question, "What's the vowel that goes between the T and the N?"  Really, any of our vowels would have allowed for the same pronunciation: Peytan, Peyten, Peytin, Peyton, Peytun. Or couldn't they have just stuck the pseudo-vowel Y in there to make it easier on the girl? "Peytyn" is still a name with issues, but at least it's got two clear syllables instead of one and a stutter!

Rarely does our modern quest for individuality have such tragic results. Peytn.

Worth the Wait

My good friend Laura and her husband became parents to just the prettiest baby girl last Saturday (at noon on the dot, on their due date, which is appropriate if you know them). They chose a beautiful, unique name for their daughter, and it was a very intentional name, not one decided on a whim or a flight of fancy. But Laura loves to torture, and she did not tell a single person the chosen name until the birthday.  This, of course, drove me near to insanity, and I tell you, nine months of suspense is a long time. But, it was worth the wait, just like the little cutie pie herself. Welcome to the world, Kale'a (pronounced Kalaya) Amariah! Here's an excerpt from her mama's blog:

"Kale'a means “joy” in Hawaiian. Amariah means “given/promised by God” in Hebrew. Taken together our daughter's name means “joy given by God” or “joy promised by God”."

With a name like that, little Kale'a is off to an auspicious start! And, if I had written, "little Kale'a's off to an auspicious start" instead, she'd have two!!! apostrophes in her name, which is just almost too awesome for words!

He Who Owns a Ship

There is an old Norwegian proverb that says, "He who owns a ship should give it a name." And I say, "Yes."

Names have been one of my passions since before I can remember (seriously, I bought myself my first book at age seven, and it is a baby name book that I still like to peruse). All of my dolls and stuffed animals had appropriate, thoughtful names (no teddy bears named "Teddy," unless it was for irony). In my tweens, I'd carry a little notebook with me everywhere, and it contained list upon list of my favorite names. Now that I'm married and my husband and I are growing our family, I can't deny that one of my favorite things in the world is the privilege of getting to give a NAME to a REAL person! Such pressure! Such responsibility! Such giddy joy! Proverbs 22:1 begins,  "A good name is more desirable than great riches" (yes, I know that it's referring one's reputation, but still!). Thus, it should be a quest of all humans with naming power to seek out good names!

My interest in names does not stop at baby humans. I believe that animals, vehicles, plants, computers, and anything else can all benefit from an apt appellation. I'd consider myself an expert on names if it weren't impossible to be an expert on something so subjective (if they had a nomenclature major in college, I would get my masters in it. But I think the closest thing is marketing).

The purpose of this blog is to allow me to gush and glower over names that strike me: beautiful, glorious names, hideous names that make me want to rip my hair out, names that make me go, "hmmmm," and names that fall into none of those categories. The obvious problem with such a blog is that every name is liked by somebody, and I don't like offending people (I'm a peace loving middle child). So, if I mock your favorite moniker, I apologize now and do not intend it to be a personal attack against you. Really, I'm sorry!

Oh, and this blog will not be limited to baby names (I've been known to turn up my nose at car names before: the Oldsmobile Silhouette? Really?!??!).


So join me on this journey of discovery and expression, and feel welcome to leave your own comments, critiques, and suggestions along the way!